A close friend of mine has had a marriage break up because they have recently been in close touch with Wahhabi brothers and sisters. They have influenced his wife to leave the husband on the grounds that he is not regular in his prayers, although he does pray (but is lazy). They also say that he rejects certain verses of the Qur’an, which he does not! He is just a simple Muslim… They also attack him because he is Hanafi and they reject Mathaabs. All this worsened family relations and they convinced the wife to leave the husband and get a divorce. She has done so, packed her stuff, left the house. Now the husband is bewildered.
Answered by: Mufti Abdurrahman ibn Yusuf
In the name of Allah, Most Gracious Most Merciful.
Yes, this is an extremely unfortunate situation. Causing a couple to break up is one of the worst acts a person can do, and one that Shaytan becomes most pleased with. This is also a perfect example of what ignorance and misunderstanding of the true Islamic tradition can cause a person.
The Prophet (upon him be blessings and peace) said:
“The one who turns a wife against her husband or turns a slave against his master is not of us” (Abu Dawud).
Hence, inciting the wife against the husband is a serious affair. A calm and sensible discussion on issues of faith can sometime provide great benefit. However, arguments and debates on such issues are hardly fruitful, especially with people who are not on common grounds or who do not follow the same principles.
A few steps that can be taken at this point are:
The husband can try to convince her to come back and they can discuss things over in a private atmosphere, with love and sympathy.
If this does not work then a non-biased relative or friend should act as a go between.
You could also try to find a qualified traditional scholar locally, and agree to seek his guidance and arbitration.
If they need clarification concerning the discussion that took place with the sister’s brother and whether it leads one to kufr or not, details of this can be sent to the Hanafi fiqh list and one of the Shuyukh will provide guidance in that regard.
This will be helpful in ascertaining the true implications of what the husband said as well, since rectifications need to be made if something incorrect was uttered by him.
May Allah provide a means of reconciliation.
Mufti Abdurrahman ibn Yusuf